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Ok, I’ll say it directly. Most of what you achieve—or fail to achieve—in your life has a great deal to do with what you think about, such as what is on—as much as in—your mind. Say what you like, but individual responsibility is an absolute. It axiomatic; our weaknesses, strengths, virtue, or lack of it, are our own and no one else’s. They are conceived or earned by us and no one else.

As a life coach, I have worked with lots people who are depressed. In some extreme cases I refer them to their physician or psychiatrist, but for some, their relief doesn’t require such extreme measures. In cases where therapy isn’t an issue, I suggest several self–administered practices, which have a really positive effect on their lives.

You are very proud of your progress so far; you’ve been working step by step towards your goal. You prepped for that competition, the audition you spent a month trying to get, or the job interview for your dream job, when all of a sudden your dreams are shattered because they said “no.”

I know you are sure that your business is humming along at peak efficiency. You and your folks work hard, you do your jobs well, but you are beginning to notice that the hours you put in are a bit longer than they used to be. When you consider how competitive business has become over the past 10 years, you simply can’t afford to waste time and really shouldn’t be so deluded that it isn’t happening in your business. Because, guess what—it is.

Personal vision comes from inside of you. A couple of months ago, I was working with a young woman and she talked about her vision for our planet. She said lots of sweet things about peace and harmony, about coexisting in balance with the plant. As beautiful as these ideas were, she went on and on, completely without any emotion, as if these were the things we should all want. I asked her to tell me more about her thoughts on the subject. After a pause, she said, “I just want to live on a healthy green planet,” and burst into tears. As far as I could remember, she had never said this during our previous conversations. The thoughts just jumped out of her, almost as if they had a will of their own. Yet, the images they transferred clearly had profound meaning to her, probably at levels of meaning that she may never understand.

Skills That Help You Over The Long Haul

 It has been said that the best things in life are free…well, that's bullshit. The best things in life take time, dedication, commitment, and perseverance; nothing less will do. When it comes to the things that matter, there are some important life skills that they may have forgotten to teach you while working on all those 21st Century skills in school. If you take the time and make the investment in an effort to learn them, you will find yourself on the path to success unlike some of your peers who chose to ignore them. As the old school folk say, “a word to the wise is sufficient.”

Lately I have had young clients concerned that they are going to fail to have a great career. What can they do?

I was once a farmer. I grew shade, ornamental trees, and shrubs for a living. Anytime nature is your partner things can do wrong. With that in mind, I can do cheerless. So most of the people who ask how to find a great career are ready for a gloomy conversation. Face it; the economy hasn’t been good. So I tell them that I will only work with them if they want a great career, not a good or mediocre one; it has to be a great one. Some of them have already decided they want a good career, while the rest have to decide immediately. The only right answer is “great career.” Lacking that, they are going to fail and there is little I can do.

I have mentioned in a previous blog that most of my adult working life was spent growing trees. Large trees, small trees, shade trees, as well as ornamental trees and shrubs; I grew hundreds of varieties of them. There are literally thousands of varieties of them (just look at any on-line catalog for a wholesale nursery), grown in sizes that range from less than a small twig to trees that take huge cranes to move. Frankly, moving trees is an industry unto itself. So you plant your trees and grow them from three to as many as 20 years before you sell them (typically about seven years). You plant more every year using your “crystal ball” to guess what will sell and plant your farm accordingly. 

Most people outside the neurology profession don’t really understand that the words you use actually do change your brain. When we use positive words like “love, peace, joy, or gratitude,” you change how your brain works by increasing cognitive reasoning and strengthening areas in your frontal lobes. Using positive words rather than negative ones jump-starts the motivational centers in your brain, directing them into positive action.